Suckfest: Def By Temptation

Last week and the week before were pretty lackluster for me as far as picking out new movies to watch. I mentioned before that I watched the 1979 version of Dracula based on a HorrorMovieADay review I read. Now, I’m not blaming BC over there at all, I love the site and am finally caught up on his entries (a must for any horror fan), I just got really bored with the movie. I guess I just prefer my vampires a little less Victorian. So, with that in mind I checked out a movie called Def BY Temptation (1990) on Netflix and it was even worse.

With a cover like this, how could you not be interested in this movie? Sam Jackson and Dwayne Wayne (a.k.a. Kadeem Hardison) in a vampire movie directed by a guy calling himself James Bond III (who weirdly directed two episodes of The Waltons)? I do have to note that the image on Netflix didn’t have the Troma logo, not that would have dissuaded me (I love Toxic Avenger).

The story as far as I can tell is that there’s this female vampire who hangs out in a bar and takes unsuspecting dudes back to her house. There’s also this country mouse-type dude visiting his cousin (Hardison) in the big bad city. Country Mouse gets sucked into the vampire lady’s web of sexy vampire kills. I did not get very far into this movie, maybe a half hour, 45 minutes max, because it’s SUPER boring. The problem is that they insist on showing the exact same thing over and over again. You see the vamp hit on a guy in the bar, bring him back to her place, get a little freaky and then she bites him. Sometimes she turns him and other times not, I think. It’s really a boring movie, though according to this trailer I found on YouTube, it seems to get cooler as Kadeem and the guy who would go on to play Robbie Robertson in the Spider-Man movies go after the vampire chick, seemingly to kill her and save Country Mouse. Oh, also, Sam Jackson only shows up in a dream sequence as a preacher or something just to get killed. I have no idea if he shows up later in the film as he doesn’t play a big role in the trailer.

One thing I did like about the movie was a montage of Country Mouse trying on clothes for his night on the town with Kadeem. Meanwhile, Kadeem’s watching and laughing/commenting on the wacky fashion choices. Now, I love me a good montage regardless of what the subject is, but the funny thing is that this scene is VERY similar to one I just watched today in the best rollerblading movie of all time Airborne (review soon). One of you video wizzes should really splice the two together, it’d be awesome…probably.

Needless to say, I was pretty disappointed by the movie. It’s not that I was expecting much (though I did love A Different World so much I actually had a pair of Dwayne Wayne flip glasses and would proudly wear adult versions today), but the fact that I can so rarely stay up late enough to watch a movie thanks to my commute that I wanted this one to be good. In the end I turned it off and watched an episode or two of Charles in Charge before calling it quits and then was dragging ass the next day. I guess I learned my lesson. For now…