2014 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

Madison Square Garden can seat 20,000 people for a concert. This blog was viewed about 61,000 times in 2014. If it were a concert at Madison Square Garden, it would take about 3 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

TeeFury Fun

A few weeks back TeeFury had a blind box deal in which you could pay $5 for a shirt, but had no idea what shirt you’d be getting. I like most of the shirts that pop up on there and figured “What the hell?” and ordered three shirts. Well, I got the shirts in yesterday and was pretty pleased. The one on the left says United Rocks Against Scissors And Paper (can’t find a link for this one), the middle is a take on Charlotte’s web with “bacon” in the webbing instead of “some pig” and the one on the right is Lost’s Locke with “WWJLD” underneath. They all fit great and I’m wearing the rock, paper, scissors one as I type.

Something Strange Is Happening

Today’s been a strange day. I went to bed last night around 2:30AM and had 9 or so hits. My usual UnitedMonkee daily hits fall between 100 and 150, and sometimes a bit higher, but never above 200. Today, I got up and turned my computer on at 11:00AM and I had something like 330 hits. I have no idea why, so I checked the WordPress stats and it’s not really helping. Right now as I write this at 5:44PM, I’ve got 371 hits! I have no idea what’s going on, but it’s crazy. Hopefully if it’s legit and you’re a new reader, you’re enjoying the site.

How Do You Like The New Digs?

God, I hope this all works. As I mentioned the other day on my 500th post post, I’ve been looking to update the site a bit. After a lot of tinkering with Word Press and a ton of editing (there’s no more of those old “this post does not go on” notes) I think it’s finally ready to show off. Now I just need to make sure the switchover from Blogger to WP goes off without a hitch. As I type I’ve already got confirmation that the payment has gone through, but typing in http://www.unitedmonkee.com doesn’t bring up my site so I’m kind of hanging in limbo at the moment.

Anyway, you’ll notice a few changes. For one thing the pictures are WAY bigger than they used to be. I’m guessing that’s just something that happens when you switch formats (they’re probably the size they were originally uploaded at as opposed to the edited versions I put in to wrap around the text. What do you think? Should I aim for larger images as they appear now or smaller, like on the old site? You might also notice some missing videos on the older posts. That’s another difference between WP and Blogger, but I’ve already figured out how to correct that. If you do come across a video that doesn’t seem to be there (or anything else for that matter), give me a holler. I’m still working the kinks out, so any help will be appreciated.

And, finally and most importantly, by far the coolest thing about the new site has got to be the rad logo. Rickey (of Cool Kids Table and Rowdy Schoolyard fame) drew the image of me and the monkey. This has been a project months in the making and he really killed it. The only problem? I didn’t realize how friggin’ small the area for the image would be. Ah well, I think it looks pretty fantastic. Thanks also has to be given to Em who helped me figure out the fonts and color for the logo along with the colors for the rest of the site. As of now it’s 3:19AM, I’ve been sitting at the computer since about 9:00PM and the site still isn’t being recognized when I type it in. I’m hoping it will just take some time and am tempted to wait it out, but I’m pretty exhausted, so I’m going to head to bed. Hopefully I’ll wake up to my brand new site. Night!

500th Post

Hey gang, sorry for the lack of posts this week, but the missus and I traveled to New Hampshire for the holidays. Hopefully you all got the perfect amount of pumpkin pie over the holiday, I had to settle for this tiny one I picked up at Building 19, but on the plus side, I did read through a bunch of trades of which I will have reviews up soon and even live blogged a movie called Night of the Demons, which will be going up right after this (I brought my laptop, but her folks don’t have wireless, and their computer chair isn’t the most comfortable, so forget it).

Anyway, to celebrate this 500th post, which I’m sure no one but me really cares about I wanted to share my brief blogging history with you. UnitedMonkee was launched back in March of this year with a post called Why Hello There, but it wasn’t my first foray into the world of blogging. In fact, a good chunk of the posts on this blog were actually copied over from a blog I had while working at Wizard called Kickin’ It Old School (you can read all the KIOS posts under the label of the same name to the left). I was actually walking with former Wizard internet czar Jim Gibbons. We were walking towards the New York Comic Con and I asked if I could do a blog for the Wizard site. He said sure, but asked me what it would be about, so I told him I’d think about it. A little while later I came at him with the idea of a blog that looks at older material as opposed to the up-to-date stuff most of the other blogs zeroed in on. The scope would of course open up, but that was the original idea. That first post went up May 9th, 2008.

For the longest time I was actually very anti-blog. Who cares what I have to say about anything? Well, not too many people at the moment, about 50-100 each day, but that’s a whole hell of a lot more people who would listen to me ranting in my house every day. It really grew on me and I’ve become a huge fan of the medium. As you can maybe see if you go through the older posts (from either KIOS or UM), I’ve gone back and forth trying to figure out the best way to actually write something and present it. I’m basically learning as I go and I hope you guys are enjoying it.

So, what does the future of UnitedMonkee hold? I’ve got a crack design team (Rickey) working a new logo that combines the awesomeness of monkeys, beer and his art. I’m also slowly working on a sight redesign through WordPress, but it’s slow going as my patience is running low. Any designers out there want to give a hand? Drop me a line. Also, like my October-wide Halloween Scene posts, I want to do the same with Christmas this year. I’m sure that won’t bring in as many younger readers, but I’m hoping my reviews of White Christmas and Holiday Inn might bring in that ever-present elderly readership I’m trying to nail down.

Well, that about sums it up, hopefully this was interesting to a few of you. If not, give it a second and the Night of the Demons live blog will be up. Followed soon after by my review of the Justice books. I’m just waiting to see if the Steelers break my heart or not tonight. I’m thinking they might, but hoping the rag tag group of scrubs they’ve got in there can pull it off. Dixon just ran it in for a touchdown!!! They’re up! Okay, gotta finish watching this, have a good one!

Happy Turkey Day

Hey everyone, hope you had a good Thanksgiving, ate plenty of mashed potatoes and stuffing and enjoyed watching some pretty one-sided football games (I hate the Lions for sucking so bad, damn them for making me root for them with my eyes closed so tight). If you get the reference, bonus points for you. Posts will probably be pretty few and far between this weekend, though I do feel a creeping urge to write a bit about my history with Black Friday shopping (or as we used to call it, Day After Thanksgiving shopping). Maybe tomorrow after getting up early for breakfast and then coming back while the ladies go shopping. Also, that’ll be my 500th post! Crazy, right?

Super Podcast Fun Time

As I’m sure I mentioned before, my fellow Twisted ToyFare Theatre writers and I were interviewed by the War Rocket Ajax guys and I’m excited even though they spelled my last name wrong in the write up. Hit the above link to check it out. I haven’t had a chance to listen yet, but I hear we’re on around minute 17, but I’m sure the whole thing’s enjoyable. Also, get a load of this awesome poster they made. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Mego Spidey drawn so well, he looks sick. I will be saving this image!

In other podcast news, my buddy Ben Morse got interviewed over on the Robot Sweatshop podcast in regards to his epic Werewolf By Night Christmas story. Make sure to check that one out too.

Happy listening!

This Is The Coolest Couch Ever

Anyone who knows me well, knows that I hate hyperbole. If you’re saying something is the best or it’s your favorite, then it should be that and every time you use those words, you diminish them. That’s my grammar pet peeve of the day. That being said, this is absolutely the coolest couch ever. I saw a commercial for this thing called the Super Bob from Bob’s Discount Furniture and just had to share it with the world.

Not only is it a full couch (or sofa as they call it on the website), which I appreciate considering I’ve been making due with a freakin’ love seat for three years, but it sports dueling recliners and a fold-up middle console which offers up reading lights and a drink cooler! Also, it looks kind of like a Transformer, which I’m all for.

So here’s what it looks like normally, kind of ugly, but it doesn’t bother me.

Here’s the recliners in action.

This is the top part of the middle section that flips back to offer up the lights.

And finally, here’s the beverage holder.

There’s also a loveseat with recliners and a center console.

And here’s the center console.

You can pick up the loveseat for $699, the couch for $799 and both together for $1498. That seems like a helluva deal to me.

Anyone wanna buy me one?