Real World Watcher: D.C. Episode 12 & The S#!t They Shoulda Shown

Tonight’s post will essentially cover two hours of Real World programming which is why it’s going up so late, for those of you who anxiously await my rundowns every week. The main episode was okay, nothing special. With this being the penultimate episode of the scene I’m surprised with how much they’re cramming into an episode. This one has a significant other visit, at least three charitable events, a wedding, a concert and a big problem with a significant other, but there were really three important stories (and none of them were the charitable stuff, just for the record). For the full post, hit the jump, this turned out to be a long one thanks to the extra hour!

The first and I’d say most prominent and important story involved Mike and his boyfriend Tanner coming for a visit. The actual visit itself isn’t all that interesting. They hang out, he introduces Tanner to the house and presumably the have sex. Then, while Ty and Andrew attend Josh’s cousin’s wedding in Philly, Tanner and Mike hand out literature and stickers promoting gay marriage. After Tanner leaves, Mike has a fairly moving talk with the girls where he says for the first time he’s really thinking about getting married, but he literally can’t. But, he doesn’t just want to get married, he wants to get married in the Church. Now, I completely support gay marriage and hope it becomes a reality very soon, but I don’t see the Catholic Church changing its stance on the whole endeavor. Speaking of which, once Tanner got home he told his mom he was gay and she got pretty upset. Later in the episode it sounded like he basically had to choose between his love of Mike and his family which is really too bad. Like the cast, I hope things will change socially in the next few years, but the whole Prop 8 thing doesn’t bode well.

As I mentioned, Josh invited Ty and Andrew to his cousin’s wedding. This didn’t really take a ton of time in the episode, but got more screen time than any of the charity stuff. You get to see Ty and Andrew get lost and meet all of Josh’s family. And part of the wedding. And then you get to see Ty hitting on Josh’s mom (who he later reveals, in the conversation about sexuality with Mike) that his mom is actually bi. The Ty dancing with Josh’s mom stuff was pretty funny. I’m guessing they threw this in because it was funny and it shows that Josh actually has some depth instead of the full-of-himself dbag we’re been shown mostly.

Finally, and still involving Josh, we got shown his band’s first headlining gig at a hotel. They sounded pretty good, but the first song they played sounded just like another song I can’t place. Some hip hop jam. Just as I was about to get it, they would cut to something else and I’d lose it. Anyway, their band sounds good, but they had pretty dorky stage presence with the guitar player wearing a backwards baseball cap/T-shirt combo and the bassist wearing what looked like a Devo knit hat of some kind and then Josh in his leather vest. Josh even sounded okay as a singer in the bits we heard, but they cut in and out a lot so it’s hard to tell. Better than the actual performance though was watching Andrew try and look cool pumping his fist in the air and Ty in the front row high-fiving Josh like he was a groupie. That shit made me laugh.

For the Shit They Shoulda Shown special I’ll just run down these points I found interesting. I will say that the editors of Real World need to take a page from Jersey Shore and get to more interesting/sexy with what they use to fill whole episodes because this season was a ridiculous mix of boring and infuriating that almost turned a long-time Real World fan off the show.

Apparently Ashley hooked up with tons of different guys at the same time!

Emily apparently hooked up with a bunch of chicks too and lied about going to the bookstore.

Josh and Andrew brought a lot of “beaters” home. Apparently Josh is pretty loud when he gets down.

Mike got offered a job as a male stripper after a party at the mansion.

Mike liked to be naked and has big balls.

A couple of the cameramen were apparently pretty hot.

Andrew used the girls’ razors to shave his balls. Mike joined too.

Ashley likes to talk about her boobs and auditioned to pose for Playboy. I bet that’ll come out soon enough. She has big nips.

I’m not surprised that Andrew is a serial groper. Seeing him fall off his bed is pretty hilarious.

Andrew puts lotion on people while they sleep. Jesus, these broads were way too forgiving.

He also stole their underwear. This dude’s totally a serial killer.

A lot of them masturbated at the gym they all went to. Crazy. Except Callie, she’s never masturbated.

Ashley got really drunk, like bombed and peed in the corner and most of the roommates (including her) didn’t even know about it.

Andrew’s one of those assholes who can’t just absorb a joke, he has to take it to a whole different, level of assholery.

Ty’s very cheap, sticks other people with the cab ride and got kicked out of bars for not paying. Wow, an extra level of douchery.

They played a lot of Truth Or Dare and Never Have I Ever.

Erika was very guarded about her body and wore a bathing suit in the shower.

Andrew watched them in the shower. Jesus, total creep. This special is really mostly about how big of a douche he is. I want to see him get his ass demolishing on a Challenge or Cops, whatever.

This really REALLY is the shit they should have shown because this season SUCKED.

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