Jersey Shore Season 3 Episode 9 “Hooking Up”

Hey, here’s a shocker, when Jersey Shore isn’t focusing on two jerks who shouldn’t be together constantly fighting and trying to figure out whether they should or shouldn’t be dating, it’s actually a pretty fun and entertaining show. If only Sammi had left earlier! We begin the episode with Snooki and the dude she brought home at the end of the previous episode (the one whose name she couldn’t remember) waking up. He doesn’t want to cuddle her and asks if he can leave, which he does. Snooki really knows how to pick winners, doesn’t she? Anyway, later in the day, she calls this dude Nick who’s one of Roger’s friends and it sounds like they’re going to hang out, but he won’t pick up her ridiculous number of calls in a row, so JWOWW calls Roger to find out what’s up and it turns out that the dude she slept with the previous night is friends with Nick’s cousin, who she also hooked up with. Or something. The whole thing was confusing. Snooki just can’t catch a break this episode, because later she wants to cuddle with Vinny after going to the club but he’s not having it because she just hooked up with some random dude a few days prior. Ronnie’s also having a bit of a tough time, but I think this might be the first episode in a while where he wasn’t sad or crying. Instead he called his pops who comes down to the Shore to hang out with his boy. Ronnie’s talking about leaving and his dad has the good point that the break up is going to hurt no matter where he is, so he might as well stay at the Shore. Later Ronnie talks to Sammi on the phone and she says that, if she comes back, they can be friends, but Ronnie tells the camera that he doesn’t think he can see himself being friends with her. In a lighter moment, Ronnie took a spin on the tiny motorbike Mike wound up buying for Pauly as a birthday present after wasting $100 on a boardwalk game that he brought back to the house after work. The rest of the day/episode winds up being rough for almost everyone involved. Snooki and Deena get bored and start having a marshmallow fight, then decide to stick marshmallows all over the house including the phone. Then they decide to go to a place called Jenkinson’s. I have no idea what that is, but it’s apparently near Red Bank. Anyway, they ask Mike if he wants to go and he says he needs to make some phone calls. While talking to his sister they start harping on him to use the phone to get a cab. He hangs up with his sis and makes the call for them, but decides to play a prank of his own and asks the cab company to tell the girls they’re going to Jenkinson’s but to actually take them to Times Square. It’s a pretty funny prank, but doesn’t seem comparable to sticking marshmallows all over the house. Anyway, the cab driver’s really nice and charming and they don’t realize what’s happening for a while because he tells him he’s trying to avoid traffic. Eventually they realize they’re heading to NYC and kind of freak out, but the cabbie stops, lets them get out so they can buy booze and enjoy their ride home. Meanwhile, back at the house, the guys decide to go get some dinner and ask Mike if he wants to go. He says sure, then jumps on the phone and makes a call. Before he’s done the other guys have gotten ready to go out. But Mike still needs to get changed. He says he needs five minutes but winds up spending an undesignated amount of time upstairs with the guys calling up to him several times. Pauly’s getting pissed and Ronnie needs to get out of the house so they just leave, Pauly’s thinking being that Mike needs to understand they mean business when they’re going to leave. There’s some beautiful editing as they drive to the restaurant and Pauly talks about Mike trying to get with his ex in the previous episode (the bloom seems to be falling off the Mike/Pauly rose). Then, once they get to the place and Mike has gone with JWOWW to get some food which he eats alone for some reason there’s some wonderful cutting back and forth between the guys having a lot of fun at the restaurant and Mike sitting at a table all alone talking to versions of his roommates only he can see at the table, telling not-Ronnie that he should man up and not-Pauly that he JUST bought him a birthday present. JWOWW stands behind him listening to the whole thing.

Eventually, the guys get back and Mike’s not too happy with them. He gives them a little shit and the only thing that bothered me is that no one straight up said to him “It’s because you didn’t get ready fast enough.” Just be straight with the dude. Then Snooki and Deena get back and act like they had an awesome time (which they didn’t really) and then Snooki flips and tells Mike she hates him. The meatballs also decided they were mad at Vinny and Pauly for not saying anything to them about the prank. Vinny tries being all serious, but Pauly just bursts in and says he’s mad at them for being mad at him and he didn’t even do anything. Dude knows how to handle a situation. At the end of the episode, it looks like the gang is getting ready to go out and have a good time. Ronnie’s laughing and making a giant drink for himself. There’s jokes being thrown all around about accents and whatnot. Then, out of nowhere, Sammi walks in. The look on Ronnie’s face was incredible. The smile MELTED off his face and as she started saying hi to the roomies he ran out the door and went to his outside crying couch. The end.

It looks like the next episode will feature Ronnie not accepting that he and Sammi are broken up, following her around the club like a psycho. Well, that’s better than them fighting all the time…I guess. I’m sensing more fighting though. Blerg.

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