You’ve probably seen at least one of the Febreeze “Breathe Happy” commercials. The idea is that people are taken off the street, blindfolded and then placed in a pretty disgusting looking room where they either stand around or sit, breathing in the air. They think it smells great because of the Febreeze being pumped out, then take their masks off to reveal the grossness they’re surrounded by. Cute idea right?

No, no it’s not. First off, I understand that this isn’t the way normal people think, but people who have seen an inordinate amount of horror movies would pull the blindfold off and instantly think they had fallen into a murder trap. If you’re unfamiliar with the concept, a murder trap is when crazy killers lure innocent victims to their murder houses under false pretenses. For instance “Hey wanna smell this room for us?” Like Admirable Ackbar would say “It’s a trap.”

Sure, you could try to explain to me that this isn’t really a murder house or that you’re shooting a commercial, but I’d probably already halfway out the window expecting Leatherface to be on my heels. You can see a little bit of that “Oh, I’m going to die” look on the blonde girl’s face at the end of the second video up there. There’s a real worry on her face that you can feel. All it would take is one nut to really think he or she’s in trouble for this to go from “that cute Febreeze” commercial to “the one that guy went crazy and jumped out the window during.”